Author: admin

Emotions come and go. Hence, no matter how bad I feel, I know that it will pass. I was caring for a client by sitting with him. He was part of a group home and required 24/7 supervision. He had a very strong anxiety due to past mistreatment. I just reassured him regularly and stayed very calm. Like my emotions, it passed for him too.

My brain lies to me by exaggerating the importance of events or mistakes that I have made. The negative thinking part of my brain has repeatedly told me that I always break the items that I am assembling at work. My brain takes a single incident and then it claims that it happens everyday. My CBT monkey (the part of my brain that is trained to use cognitive behavioral training) catches these thinking errors and works to correct them.

Everyone perceives the world differently based on their past experiences. As a child, I discovered that I interpreted the world different than those around me. My thinking is so negative that I have trouble getting some people to understand me. It makes people want to run away. Others argue with me until I start defending a belief that only the depressed part of my brain believes. Sometimes this makes me feel like no one understands me. Yet, it helps me to understand that a person can love the US but disagree on how to run the country. I believe that both Republicans and Democrats care deeply about the US. We just disagree on what is best for the country.

While everybody’s experience is different, there are similarities in our emotional experiences. I remember attending a support group. Another member was describing a symptom of his/her mental health issue. I started fidgeting in my chair because I recognized my experience in it. Over the years, I have learned that others have experienced symptoms similar to mine.

It was strange for me to think about depression in this way. I would love to never have depression ever again. What have you learned from your depression, anxiety or tough times?

I wrote goals in 2020 and 2021. Then Covid-19 came to town. I tossed out all of 2020’s goals and replaced them with a goal to stay sane. In 2021, I had a work goal to learn new skills including soldering. But, my employer never resumed training due to Covid-19. Now, I don’t think Covid-19 will end in 2022. I believe that the pandemic will last all year.

This year I have a list of goals. Some are very vague such as get a new job due to my upcoming lay off. Yet, others are more detailed such as my plan to post two times a week on this website. Thursdays will be thanksgiving Thursdays while Fridays will be feel good Friday. Once a month, I will share quotes from a book that I have read. The book may be a Bible study book, Christian non-fiction or a self-help book.

My sister C started posting monthly goals on Facebook. She has been doing a few years. I started sharing monthly goals with her. I find that the yearly goals can guide my monthly goals. I think this idea can help you and me to be more flexible as our world keeps rapidly changing. It is also easier to wrap my mind around a month rather than a year.

What are your goals for the year? What books do you plan to read?

On November 21st, a man drove a red SUV into people marching in our Christmas parade. Six people died because of this action. Here are a collection of pictures of my community’s response to this tragedy.

At first, main street where this took place had press everywhere.

While looking at the press along the street, I noticed and orange marks on the street. I suspected they were evidence markings.

As time went by, items began showing up at Veteran’s Park where the city invited people to leave memorial items.

Local businesses began posting messages of support.

The Christmas parade memorial was decommissioned and put into storage earlier this week (Wednesday morning). Now a few more items have appeared.

Usually, I feel hope for the new year. But, this year I don’t feel any hope or excitement for the new year. Pandemic is continuing while I wait for Covid-19 test results just like I did in January 2021. My nation, USA, feels more divided than ever. My employer will be laying me off in February or March. I am still waiting for my official 60 day notice as required by Wisconsin.

So, I am reminding myself that Jesus will be my shepherd just like he has done in the past. My family, friends and church will be there for me too if I reach out and ask. (I struggle with this part.)

Make Your Bed: Little Things That Can Change Your Life…And Maybe The World is by Admiral William H. McRaven. He wrote the book as an expansion on a speech given to the graduating class of 2014 at the University of Texas.

“They all understood that life is hard and that sometimes there is a little you can do to affect the outcome of your day. In battle soldiers die, families grieve, your days are long and filled with anxious moments. You search for something that can give you solace, that can motivate you to begin your day, that can be a sense of pride in an oftentimes ugly world. (Pg 9)’

A great many therapists will suggest selecting one small thing that can make your life better. My city, Waukesha,Wisconsin, had six people die due to a man driving a red SUV into our Christmas parade. I want to help but can’t donate blood since I gave on the eighteenth. I am concerned about my upcoming layoff which is limiting my willingness to donate money. Yet, I love painting rocks. While I am not any good at it, I made six rocks. One for each victim as my way of mourning their deaths and the changes to parade preparations.

What is one simple thing you can do to make your life or community better?

“It is easy to blame your lot in life on some outside force, to stop trying because you believe fate is against you. It is easy to think that where you were raised, how your parents treated you, or what school you went to is all that determines your future. Nothing could be further than the truth. The common people and the great men and women are all defined by how they deal with life’s unfairness; Helen Keller, Nelson Mandela, Stephen Hawking, Malala Yousafzai and Moki Martin (pg. 42.)”

Our past can add challenges to our endeavor to succeed in life, it can’t keep us from success. Sometimes, we have to change our goals in response to our limitations.

I dreamed of becoming a doctor when I was in high school and college. Then I learned that I freeze in emergency situations. I am now hoping I can find a way to help others through this blog. My desire to help others was my main reason for wanting to be a doctor. Now, it is my main reason for blogging and praying for others.

What are your dreams? If they are not reachable, what are your top three reasons for wanting this dream? Is there another goal that can help you to achieve this desire?

“Life is a struggle and the potential for failure is ever present, but those who live in fear of failure, or hardship, or embarrassment will never achieve their potential. Without pushing your limits, without occasionally sliding down the rope headfirst, without daring greatly you will never know what is truly possible in life. (Pg.63)”

I am not a risk taker. Yet, I am risking a failure in my writing and blogging dream by having this blog. Why? I know that if I don’t try I will always wonder if I could have succeeded.

What is one thing that you can do to work on a goal or dream?