Describe the last difficult “goodbye” you said.
Earlier this week, my cat died. In mid January, I noticed my cat was sneezing like crazy and took her to the vet. They showed me a swollen left cheek. I couldn’t figure out how I never noticed. They gave me an antibiotic. I proved my incompetence by dropping the bottle and spilling some of it. I had to go get more at the vet. Then, I was confused how long to administer it. Usually, I must use antibiotics until you run out. I stopped using it on 11 or 12. I felt guilty for forcing her to drink the the medication. I allowed that guilt to stop treating her. I started trying to make a follow up appointment after work.
In February, I started seeing red marks on my bed sheets. I tried to clean her face and discovered that she was bleeding on her face. I called my vet and got the emergency vet number. I took her to the vet while it was snowing. They told me that she had a serious dental problem and to schedule an appointment with my vet. I called the next morning at work and did that. My vet told me how much wait she had lost. She had always been skinny but now I could feel every part of her spine and ribs.
One of the vest at my clinic was out due to surgery. So, I had to make an appointment a little more than a week out. I was now administering antibiotic and a pain reliever.
Last weekend, I watched my cat get weaker and weaker. I sat with her laying on me for hours I discovered some new ridges on her skull and a tendon on the back of her neck. I told her that I will miss her if she leaves me.
Puffers died on Monday (February 27). Now, I am catless. I am working on decluttering and getting rid of some of the fur all over my apartment. I keep wanting to say,” Puffers, your human is home” when I return from work. I keep thinking that I need to feed her in the mornings and evenings.
I pray that there is a pet heaven like in the rainbow bridge poem.